What Is Survival Guilt?
We are including a piece on this very common feature of traumatic incidents because it is likely that many people will be feeling 'they shouldn't be involved in the Network' or they don't deserve much attention because they weren't on the train or, if they were, they weren't in the worst affected carriages. Surprisingly, even people in these carriages still suffer because they were not injured as badly as others. Even injured people find reasons why they shouldn't get as much help as someone who seems worse off than they are. This feature is so common it has even been given names - 'downward comparison' and the 'hierarchy of suffering'.
Why do we do it? It could be a survival strategy to get the feeling of control back again and to find a reason why we don't need help. Accepting help can feel like losing control again to some people.
Is it a problem? Well, you can get fed up with being called 'lucky' if people then ignore your needs, especially if you also feel you 'don't deserve help'. It can also mean that the most obviously affected have everyone telling them that need help. They get more than they can cope with and can feel that they are being kept as victims. It is also hard if people keep away from others because they feel 'guilty' for being less affected.
The message is:
Everyone affected has the right to their experience and the right to get the type of help they need. It may not be as much or the same as others, but if those on the edge of the affected community get themselves sorted out early, then they are in a better position to support the ones who do need more help.
A case in point:
One Networker who was badly injured feels 'lucky' because she was knocked out and didn't take in any of the horrific images that people who walked away from the train uninjured did.